Sex Before Marriage

SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE

Nowadays sex is a big thing. Everybody always talk about sex and not only adults talk about sex but also children do. We can watch and hear about sex in movies, television, music, magazines and in the school. And everyone has different perception about sex. Some people say that sex is just for fun and some say that sex is the grace of God that it must be protected and not neglected by us. Sex  is the physical difference between male and female. Everybody needs sex. God created sex because He wanted the people to “be fruitful and multiply” and God also wanted the people to develop intimacy with one another, and He knew that sex would help the people do that, in a way that nothing else could. Because of sex is so powerful in creating intimacy that there must be some constraints on how it was to be used, so God specifically relegates sex to the arena of marriage. The kind of intimacy that God desires between a married couple can not occur between one person and several others; it can only be experienced between one man and one woman. Hence God has specifically said, “Do not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14), and “Flee sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18). That is, do not have sex with someone who is not your spouse. Obedience requires that sex be reserved for one’s spouse. But nowadays many people do sex before marriage. Some people exactly the girls who do sex before marriage say that they did it because they love each other and it is not problem for them to do that. They did it without compulsion. And some say that they did it because they do not want to lose the one they love. They will do everything for their love eventhough they must lose their virginity. Actually it is the wrong perception even having sex before marriage has so many disadvantages and it can harm and damage us.There are three reasons not to have sex before marriage. They are the God’s command, the safety/health reason, and the relationship reason.

The first reason not to have sex before marriage is God’s command. God created the sex act for a man and a woman within marriage. Besides being pleasurable, sex is meant to be a spritual experience in the everyday life of a marriage life. It is not just setting up house together, but the sex act locks the couple together in the purpose that God has set before. In creating sex, God intended to help the marriage couple works out indifferences between them, along with the need of procreation. God commands against premarital sex in order to protect unmarried people from unwanted pregnancies, from children born to parents who do not want them, and to protect children from parents who are not prepared for them. The Bible refers to sex before marriage as fornication (sexual intercourse between people who are not married to each other). Sex before marriage is just as much of a sin as adultery and all other forms of sexual immorality. The Bible explains, "…The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body" (1 Corinthians 6:13). Verse 18 of this chapter goes on to say, "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body." Galatians 5:19 speaks the same, "The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity…" Ephesians 5:3 says it most plainly, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." From these verses, we see that the Bible promotes complete and total abstinence from sex before marriage. When we choose to have sex before of marriage, we settle for less than God's perfect will, for ourselves and for our partner. And if we do this and not doing God’s command, we don't know what we might end up with. Perhaps we'll end up in a miserable marriage. God has a reason for giving us this command. First and foremost, He knows what is the best for us and He wants us to live in our purity. By obeying him, we trust God to look out for our best interests.

The second reason not to have sex before marriage is safety/health reason. Sex before marriage means sexual intercourse between people who are not married to each other and it means that it is done not only to one person but also to more than one person. That is why it is so dangerous having a sex before marriage. It can damage our health. The research found that many people who always do sex before marriage can be infected by STD (Sexually Transmitted Diseases).  The kind of sexually transmittes diseases are gonorrhea, syphilis, genital herpes, genital warts, trichomoniasis, urethritis, and aids. All of them are caused by sexual activities. One of the diseases which is well-known by the people is Aids. Aids is the foremost sexually transmitted diseases that everyone is quite aware of. It is spread by the retrovirus called HIV (human immunodeficiency virus) . The most common way of contracting AIDS is through sexual intercourse with many men/women. HIV can damage the effectiveness of the immune system in our body. As we know immune system helps protect us from infection. That is why if our immunity is strong, we will not easily get the diseases. But if our immunity has broken, we will easily get the diseases. So the people who is infected by HIV can easily get the sickness and substantially increase incidence of several cancers and then Aids can befall to other people by having a sex and to children whom their mother is infected by HIV. Although many people think that they can prevent the diseases of having sex by using condoms which are very much available and they are free can prevent the fluids which contain the virus from entering a person's body through sexual intercourse, they are not 100% safe. We can still be infected by HIV as long as we are still having a sex before marriage. There is no cure for Aids but there is the prevention of getting Aids. The prevention of getting Aids is just to avoid having a sex before marriage.

The third reason of not to have sex before marriage is relationship reason. First, sin of having a sex before marriage always damages the relationship with God. God has commanded us not to have sex before marriage. If we still do sex before marriage, it means that we do not obey His command. God is pleased when His children choose obedience and self-control instead of the immediacy of pleasure. God has specifically said “Do not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14), and “Flee sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18)”.  The second is sex before marriage can damage our relationship with the people in our surrounding. The people who do not agree and against having sex before marriage do not like the people who have sex before marriage because they are not pure and they are the bad people. In my perception, if someone do sex before marriage, he/she is also drankard and the user of drugs. Nobody wants to be their friends. And another reason why no one wants to be their friends is because she/he is afraid if he/she can be influenced of willing of having a sex before marriage. Actually everbody needs sex, so if someone invites us and persuades us to have sex before marriage. We may be influenced us to do it. The third is sex before marriage also damages the relationship between the persons involved. If two people do not cherish sex enough to wait for a marriage commitment, how can they trust one another for fidelity? Conversely, a man and woman build trust and respect for one another when they both survive the struggles of self-control — each will have the confidence that the other respects them, and cherishes their intimacy. Similarly, if a person has not carried sexual purity into marriage, his or her marriage relationship is affected by the past. If a man or woman has previously had sex with someone else, their marital intimacy has already been affected. One or both spouses will have to deal with real or perceived comparisons with “former lovers” and feeling that intimacy was not important enough for the other person to wait for it. But if both have waited for their wedding night, the intimacy has already begun with a solid foundation.

In conclusion, sex is a good thing. It must be, if God created it! The only way to keep it a “good thing” is to follow God's guidelines. God will reward you if you choose to honor Him, and save sex for its proper time and place — your marriage. When we choose to participate in premarital sexual activity, we will take virus, fungi, bacteria, yeast, spores, or parasitic contamination into the marriage bed once they decide to commit to one partner. Saving oneself  for  marriage keeps the marriage bed pure from the attack of the germ world. So it is the wrong way if we choose to have sex before marriage.